peer letter
Order Description
With this step in the process remember that you are not an editor, but a peer giving feedback. Consider asking questions instead of telling your peer what they should or shouldn’t do. This alleviates the responsibility from you and your notes.
You are expected to respond to at least TWO group member’s papers. These letters will discuss the strengths and weaknesses of their papers.
The letters need to be at least 300 words each.
They need to cite the author’s paper by using quotes and referring to specific parts of the paper.
You may want to offer suggestions for places to elaborate and allow the offer to gain more insight into their work – see suggestions below.
Possible Questions to address in Peer Letters:
What is the author’s thesis? Is it effective?
How well does the paper develop?
Does it make note of themes and justify how they develop the story, poem or play? Does it reinforce the thesis?
Does the author truly analyze the story or is she simply summarizing? What suggestions would you make?
Is there a discussion of characters, word usage, metaphor or any other literary tool? Is it effective?
Are there quotes and do they seem effective?
How does the paper conclude without simply restating the opening?

1) Technology’s Effect In My Life(MacDonald, Devon)

Humans feel the need to be in a constant rush and this must be the reason why we are called the human race. It is in our blood, our history. From the invention of the ship that allowed people to move across seas to the invention of the lightbulb that stemmed off of Ben Franklin’s discovery of electricity, we feel the need to grow and explore. During the industrial revolution of the eighteen hundreds, came the invention of the assembly line and then the car. Assembly lines meant that we could get our inventions out into the world faster. When the invention of the computer came around, so did the invention of the World Wide Web. Through the internet we now have access to millions and millions of information. Gadgets and gizmos invented using internet based technology effects everyone’s day to day lives. My generation has seen many different innovations in technology. We have seen people being able to reach each other globally with the touch of a button or an opening of an application. When I was in third grade my peers would carry around tomogatchies which was a Japanese interactive game that would immolate how to take care of a pet. When my parents’ generation was in third grade they didn’t have anything like that. It was only when my parents were high school when the first video game came out; pong. Pong was simply a video game whose objective was to hit a digitized ping pong ball back and forth on the screen. Now we have advanced even farther.
2) Here is a draft of my paper on the effect the internet has had not only on me but on the world.

I am concerned about 3 major things:

The first is that is my paper on-topic? Is it following the prompt? Im worried as I wrote my paper I strayed further and further away from the original prompt.

The second is I feel like a lot of my paper is very repetative, I need to go through and fix that issue as I think I would be more effective if i made statements only once but then went back and supported those statements.

The last concern I have is that it is boring. I need to find a way to retain my readers attentions. Even I got bored and started skimming my paper while reviewing it and I agree with every statement I made!

Thanks for any feedback you can make and any suggestions/ help you can provide.
Gray Robertson